You know, ganito kahaba ang ipakilala ko. (laughter) Well, we matter, but what matters most is—what has happened three years end. Hindi lang ako mag—tutal kilala naman. What is important is gusto ko agad magsalita, kaya ako, I boarded the truck and called for the guys who has had or who have a thing to work in connection with the Yolanda victims.

Alam mo, I came three years ago when this incident happened. And I was sad. Ngayon, sinabi ko sa kanila sa truck, hindi ako galit, do not be offended, but pagtanong ko, three years after, iilang tao pa lang ang nakatira sa mga bunk houses or the relief houses that are provided by government. 

I am not satisfied. As a matter of fact, it’s a—it’s BS to me. Three years, wala pay nakabalhin kaayo. Ano ba naman? (applause/cheers). Wag na lang natin ituloy kaya iyan, gawain na natin sementeryo, maghintay tayo ng Yolanda Jr. (laughter) Anak— hindi ko akalain. 

You know, I just introduced reforms in the national government. In the national offices, irrespective of the department, they are only given one month to process the papers. It must be out by one month. Ang local government, since you are not under me directly, I do not have the control but I have the supervision, I would be coming out of rules that binds everybody, including Government Corporations. Na kung gani itong LWUA. I said, hindi ako galit sa inyo, itong LWUA, NHA, DPWH, you do that again and I will fire all of you. I will ask you to resign. (applause) Totoo. 

Tutal, iyan ang mga kaibigan ko, I mean, dito sa itaas, nakikinig iyan. Ang problema sa down and it’s not pouring, its trickling in trickles. And this, what—I don’t know it has—alam mo indolence is part of corruption. When you are paid for eight hours to do your work, magtrabaho ka ng eight hours. Do not shortchange the public.

Now, this three years, wala na; two years, ganyan din. Alam mo, we are all Christians. If you read the Bible, it is only God who controls everything including the reason why we are here. Its mind boggling, but we do not have the answer. What he proposed to us, at least in the Bible which says that, ‘he will come back here to judge the living and the dead.’ If you believe in the Holy Spirit, the Holy Catholic Church, so about three years from now, magbaba na naman si Kristo (laughter) to judge us: the living and the dead. And the theory is that the dead will rise from itself, I don’t know kung saan iyan, maglibingan ba tayo kung meron pa?

Iyang houses na iyan, eh kung hindi pa matapos iyan sunod na buwan, eh put—gawain mo na lang, gawain mo na lang crematorium iyan. Kasi ano ang sabihin ko dito? What am I supposed to say here? Three years from now has passed, at kayo, naghintay na lang ng isa pang typhoon na—sana pagdating namin dito wala na tao, para we do not have to say “I am sorry, na dumating ng ganito.” Really, ako po ay naghihingi ng tawad sa inyo. 

But for all others, I have fired so many men in government, its either magkaintindihan tayo o hindi. Ako ho, I proposed something like this: I was not elected to sit down there. It was never my ambition to be President. Eh kung nandiyan na rin lang ako, eh magtrabaho na lang tayo lahat. Because ako, I never coveted the position. Alam ko lang, alam ninyo, ni wala akong isang Congressman, wala akong isang Governor, except Imee and Governor Garcia of Bataan and a Governor in Mindanao, the only lady and the only reason why na sinuportahan niya ako, kasi kasintahan ko siya. (laughter) Iyan ang totoo, hindi ako nagpapatawa. She used or was or girlfriend ko noon. (cheers/laughter).

Totoo, nanalo ako except for Davao. Ni wala akong isang barangay captain sa Central Luzon. That’s why, the sense of commitment is there because wala kang pera, wala kang makinarya, and yet the Filipino people gave you an overwhelming mandate to serve. You know, if this the kind of service that I came here for, I’m really – I’m sorry, I said, I don’t want to offend anybody, I am not satisfied. Now three years, how many days? 

I’d like to ask the Presidential Assistant for the Visayas to— Mike Dino, I’ll put him in charge. Kaya nga, Presidential Assistant siya. Mike, maggawa ka ng bahay diyan, diyan ka tumira. Putang-ina, you oversee the—I want this thing completed. I will be back. Babalik ako. (applause/cheers) Ano tayo ngayon? October-November? I’ll be back, December. (applause) Mike, gusto ko na sa harap nila, gusto ko, by December, gusto ko makalipat na lahat. Putang-ina yang tubig na iyan, gawaan mo sila ng swimming pool. Gawaan mo sila ng lahat basta I will be back, I promise you. In the fullness of God’s time, I will be back December. (applause/cheers) ‘Pag wala pa ito sila na lipat diyan lahat, dalhin mo na sa— kumuha ka ng lupa diyan sa Bonifacio o Forbes Park, bigyan mo iyan sila tag-isa-isa.  It’s a commitment ha? 

Para rin—alam mo Mike, sa totoo lang, bihira ako nagbabaril ng tao, lalo na kung kaibigan. Pag hindi mo nagawa iyan patay. (laughter) So you guys, you take your orders, but henceforth, nandito iyong sa Housing. Nandito si Leni. She’s in-charge of the Housing. (applause) Lahat naman ng ano—next time, you take orders from her. And the same, same order that she’s supposed to finish her job on time. 

Hindi tayo puwedeng magbilangan, you know, we are so underdeveloped, a country, that by the nature of the laziness and indolence of some idiots, lalo tuloy tayong naging double the underdeveloped, whatever that phrase means. Kaya hindi ko talaga—kasi kung alam ko lang na wala pa pala tapos, at three years from now, hindi pa tapos— sabagay, pupunta rin ako dito, kasi nandito si Vice President eh. (cheers) Kung saan siya nagapunta, nagapasunud-sunod ako. (laughter) Pero biyuda kasi (cheers). Annulled man ako sa— totoo, annulled ako sa asawa ko. Pero may anak ako, basta masuportahan lang, okay lang iyon. Ma’am, balita ko may boyfriend ka na (laughter). Sabi diyan sa ano,’wag ka mahiyaan ha? Do not be offended pero iyong sabi nila, hindi ho totoo? Eh kung totoo iyon, ma’am, may patay na congressman na bago (laughter/applause). Para mabiyuda ulit.

You know, maybe the next time, I’ll sit down with her and some guys from Davao na—who were with me for the past 20 years— 23 years that I was mayor, at baka makatulong kami. Hindi namin— I’m not saying that we are the only ones who have the expertise. But in— you know, in you know, hastening everything, makatulong sila sa input. 

You know, I’d come up with a, maybe regulations na local government permits should be out, sa Davao, it’s three days: electrical; business permit; whatever permit; permit to die, the better. Kung ano, basta it has to be— and only in us. Ako, I do it 72 hours. Any business permit that you’d like to apply, it’s 72 hours in Davao. No, no, walang ano, then beyond that, you go to the mayor and explain why you need more than 72 hours to process the papers. For example, if you want to conduct an ocular inspection, you can do that. It would take time. But you have to have some sort of rules for efficiency in this government. 

Kaya itong mga komunista, they tried and they are correct because we have failed miserably just really to govern effectively. Not just govern, because you are there, you receive your salary, pero iyong tao—alam ninyo kasi iyong taga-gobyerno and even the politicians, pag napanalo sila, nag-iiba ang anyo, ang isip. They begin to swagger around. Then they go out with bodyguards and all, tapos they think that they are the special elite chosen by God for that particular epoch. Ganoon iyan eh, nag-iiba. Pati iyong taga-gobyerno. Instead of just realizing that he is there to help also is, para sa kaniyang mahirap pa rin.

Ito iyong paglabas diyan alas dose, magbalik ng alas tres. You know, if you do that, ang akin kasi ngayon I do not go for any kind of ano, it’s summary dismissal. Mga pulis, you’d begin to fuck your trabaho, hindi kita papalusutin. But, lahat ng pulis na napasubo sa trabaho, they will have my protection, and I will not allow a single policeman to go to prison just because he was doing his duty. Tandaan ninyo iyan. Kayong mga pulis, wala kayong problema basta sa trabaho, either I rise or sink with you. I will not abandon you and I will be there. Trabaho lang. (applause)

Pero ‘pag inabuso niyong civilian, ayaw ninyong magtrabaho, papasok kayo ng droga, putang-ina, papatayin ko talaga kayo (cheers/applause). Sa totoo lang, hindi ko kayo palulusutin. I don’t give a shit kung sino ka. And that is a warning for everybody. And the new rule now, I have somebody to remind me, I will return the Alunan doctrine. The doctrine says that more than three bodyguards, including you, kung may armas ka, pangatlo ka, that’s a private army and you will be arrested. Wala akong pakialam kung sinong governor ka o mayor. 

We go back to the simple days of— you can have one or two. Ngayon magdala ka, magpractice ka. Kung hindi ka marunong magbaril, huwag kang mag-mayor, huwag kang mag-governor. Talawan mo. Dapat sumali ka na lang diyan sa… We go back to ‘no more than two policemen’ and it should not be— the choice should come from the PNP. Hindi kayo makapili ng tao kasi diyan ang abuso. “Ah ito, bata ito, anak ito ng barangay captain ko.” You only have two, get it from the service company of the— merong— there’s an office there for special units kung maghingi ka. Only if you are in danger. 

Kayo namang mga NPA that— nakikinig ngayon, eh kung dalawa lang ang kasama sa pulis, huwag ninyong sobrahan. Dalawa lang rin, tabla-tabla iyong fight. Ahh, ambush-ambush. Ambushin ninyo tig-isang MRGU. Dalawang pulis, dalawa kayo, huwag ninyong sobrahan iyong arte na— Kawawa naman iyong kalaban ninyo. I mean, there’s no sense in—

You know, we’re trying our best to come up with something. You are lucky that the— of course, I’d like to thank the Communist Party of the Philippines for giving another try, another shot at the peace process. And kung sakaling— if we succeed, then wala na masyado. Kita mo ngayon, walang patayan. Noong una ayaw ng military, ayaw ng pulis kasi NPA. So, what do we do? We’ve been fighting with them for the last 45 years. Sabi ko sa pulis, sabi ko sa mga military, “What? Do you want another 45 years of fighting?” Sabi ko, it will last because if you want then, but you know, the very bullet that I buy to kill you, comes from the pocket of the Filipino. 

Ganoon din sa MNLF. Nur Misuari came to me and said, “We talk again.” I said, “Thank you.” Ang MI, I just signed the Bangsamoro Act to replace the BBL. Eh sabi ni Nur noon, kung walang BBL, they will go to war. And I went to his camp and say “What’s the sense?” “Why? Do you want another 45 years of fighting?” “Do you really want to kill all of the Moro and the Christians?” “Is there a way to live a life more— half the decency of what we are doing to each other?” Sabi ko, mabuti na walang away but the—ang nagkulang, ang gobyerno mismo. 

I must admit, that government has fallen short, very short of the expectations of the people. Dapat iyang Yolanda, one year after tapos na iyan lahat. So you cut the red tape or I really— hindi ko malaman kung saan ako mag-umpisa. Is it really the rules which is also to protect the money of the people, or the people nandiyan sa trabaho, ayaw lang magtrabaho? Pahigain iyong papel diyan. So there must be a routing slip there, para makita ko, even how little the office is. How insignificant it is. Even if it is a public cemetery, there has to be a routing slip so that alam ko, when is the time for me to put you to sleep. 

Madali naman mag-ano ng tao, tutal ang radyo na: blah, blah, blah— tatlong araw, tapos wala. You want that? I’ll give it to you. Ganoon lang man iyan. Pilipinas, patay ka ng tao? Three days, blah, blah, blah Duterte blah, blah, blah. Pagkatapos next election, “Ehhh Duterte, Presidente na.” (laughter) Ibang klase ito. No, I’m just giving you the ironies of life.

So, I’m a little bit disappointed but still very happy to see you. Maraming magaganda na Waray. (applause). You know, I was born on the wrong side of the Island. Napagpasabak ako doon sa mga jowa, wa man jamo. (laughter) Didtu ka didtu, waray karipay. You know, I’m from Maasin, that’s the other side. One time, I was flying here going to Maasin. I could— I realized na kung bakit there was this chasm of a big divide, lahat kayong mga near the— across Samar got the dialect from them. At iyon namang— there’s a big range of mountain dividing you. So, iyon sigurong demography noon, the movement of people, really prevented you from traversing to the other side. Pero mas maano, mas— I was born here. Mas magaganda ang— nahaluan kayo ng Amerikano dito? (laughter) Aywan ko kung sinong na— marami sigurong mga Amerikano na malikot dito noon. I don’t know if they were here to land or to land on bed somebody else’s. 

Well, anyway, I’m here because I’d like really to see you. But I was thinking that everything was done on time. So by December, si Secretary— si Mike Dino, pilitin mo Mike, tutal isang tawagan mo lang ako sa telepono. There’s always the celphone and you can ask me and ask everybody to cooperate.

Kindly cooperate, do not delay government projects (applause) because it would not— kasi kung ano magbolahan lang tayo dito, tapos sabihin lang ninyo, “Ay, wala iyon eh, si Duterte tambaloslos rin iyon. Dumaan dito, wala namang”. You know, I said, it was never my intention. Hindi ho, it was not my ambition to be President. Andito na ako ngayon, wala akong— I am not due for any re-election. And besides, this I promise you, I give you my word, I’m hurrying up the federal set up because that is the only thing that would give us enough elbow room to talk to the Moro people in Mindanao, if you really want peace, and the Communist Party of the Philippines. Iyang dalawang iyan, which has the two main pressure groups in our society today, ang kailangan nila, a new set up.

Alam ko naman, I said, “Mas mabuti iyan.” But provide a federal set up with a strong president. Otherwise kung parliament pure, I do not think because of the diversity of— in so many aspects, it would not be good. You would need a strong President. I am not illegible anymore. I’m only good for 6 years but if you can craft it in about 2 to 3 years time, I’d be happy to step down. Okay na ako, sibat na ako, basta tingnan ko lang. I will just, maybe husband it from its gestation hanggang it’s a— if you can call an election 4 years from now, under the federal set up, I think it would be good for everybody.

So with that message, please do not be again offended by my— talagang medyo, hindi ako galit. I’m not— pag malaman ninyo ako galit kasi mag-sige lang— pag ako galit, sige lang ako nagtingin ng magagandang babae. (laughter/cheers)

Hindi ganoon talaga. Si Ma’am Leni, binibiro ko iyan. When the— you know, when the talks get boring and the argument starts, I always inject a joke para—to make it more—pero, totoo talaga.

Noong una sa meeting the arrangement was magkatabi kami. Sabihin ko kaya Ma’am oh, hindi ka mag-ano? Kasi si Ma’am Leni, medyo shorter than usual iyong damit na ano, ganun. Siguro nahalata ng mga protocol officer na sige ako sa likod. Sonny Dominguez naman, sabi ko, “ang layo mo, dito tayo mag—dito tayo, halika”, sabi ko. Tingnan mo iyong tuhod ni—nung nahalata niya, sige hila siya. (laughter) Gusto ko sabihin, “Ma’am, mag-shorts ka na lang kaya. (laughter) Bakit magpa-iksi-iksi ka ng damit, tapos—” So ang ginawa ng gaging, inilit niya, hindi iyong paganun. Dito makikita mo man, binaliktad niya, tapos nakaharap na doon. Wala ng view. (laughter) So noong next, mga after 3 Cabinet meetings, doon na siya sa harap ko. (Sings) Malayo ang tingin. (laughter)

Daghang salamat. (applause)